When I first met Nick Sylvester of PFM, he told me that he and his friends liked to play a game in which they all came up with the best Liars titles the band never wrote. Here’s the result of me and two of my friends coming up with an ideal track list for their next album, They Were Wrong So We Drowned, due out February 28th:

1. punks dont lie, they prefer arithmetic
2. when the world stops we’ll all crawl
3. pink was hurt when god made trees green
4. the farthest place from the duckpond…
5. please dont squeeze us
——our skeletal structure is fragile——
6. Man is for Mandate
7. death stalks on the midnight crops with a box
8. Le Coeur N’est Pas Un Mot Until
9. we buried him in a well, deep in the dirt

they’re kinda good, kinda crap, i guess. i like them a lot. play along, see what you come up with!