Magneta Lane
The Constant Lover EP

Paper Bag
Reviewed by: Ryan Hardy
Reviewed on: 2005-03-23

Posted 03/23/2005 - 09:08:40 AM by japann:
 fucking awful
Posted 03/23/2005 - 09:22:03 AM by simonlebon:
 According to most of the reviews that Ryan likes to write, he hates everything. Just take a look for yourself, he is a junior loser/writer at the and will be a junior writer here for some time. If you don't like this album, you shouldn't review it. This band is NOT, I repeat not ANYTHING like Pretty Girls Make Graves, clean out your fucking ears you negative loser.
Posted 03/23/2005 - 09:28:19 AM by simonlebon:
 read some other reviews for yourself:;=MIW050502161325&sql;=11:2fbsa9igw23g~T2;=91693.html&a;=1
Posted 03/23/2005 - 10:29:34 AM by RyanHardy:
 "If you don't like this album, you shouldn't review it." Yeah, that makes sense. Why don't we just abolish ratings altogether? Maybe reviews should just consist of congratulating the band on their effort? Don't be a baby. As for all those reviews...le yawn. I give you my opinion, not anybody else's. Don't like it? Write your own review.
Posted 03/23/2005 - 10:40:32 AM by hutlock:
 As a Stylus Editor, I do have to disagree with the notion that you should only review albums you like. That makes you a PR puppet and not a music critic, and that is not what we are about here. We don't just rubber stamp the good stuff. If you disagree with Ryan, great -- speak up, by all means. But that idea is sort of off on what we (or most other publications) are trying to accomplish.
Posted 03/23/2005 - 11:14:46 AM by belgaridub:
 When I read the Pitchfork review of this album earlier I was skeptical, so I went and found an mp3 (cheap linguistics) and was unimpressed. I just listened to the songs available on their webpage too, and am still unimpressed. I'm not really sure I buy the ripping off of Pretty Girls Make Graves. I never would have even thought of PGMG if they hadn't been referenced in the review, and maybe that's a sign of how far away from good Magneta Lane is. Regardless, the singer's voice is unimpressive bordering on annoying and they aren't doing anything exciting musically. My only question is... what's with all the hype from everybody else? Thanks for calling this one out.
Posted 03/23/2005 - 11:44:27 AM by simonlebon:
 i guess what i meant was, Ryan likes to dis records, as i can see from the records he has reviewed in the can see that for yourself, so when i say "If you don't like it, don't review it", i mean "Try and review something you actually like, you might feel better about yourself." i'm glad i even got the editor of this site to write a comment, reaction has turned out the way i wanted it. as for the song "Cheap Linguistics", it was a B-side to a 7" single they released, so therefore someone made the call the it probably wasn't as solid of a track to make it to the CD-EP, call me crazy, i'm no expert but i have a feeling that's how it works. anyways, Ryan you are for sure a REAL CHAMPION with words like "let’s get down to the business of tearing The Constant Lover to pieces.", seems like you might have dated one of the girls and she dropped your sorry ass and you have a bone to pick with them...why didn't you just give it an "F", or i can give one to you and your posse over there at"F" you. just i case you were wondering, i am a huge fan of this band and have absolutely no contact with them...i just don't like the way you review albums, your not a critic, so please you shouldn't tell anybody that you are, it's embarrassing. Bye for now, your newest pal, Simon "Eat It" LeBon.
Posted 03/23/2005 - 12:02:17 PM by japann:
 I don't want to seem like I'm rushing to this band's defence, I don't find much to like or dislike about them either way, but this is just an awful review. I'm all for slamming records you don't like but if "Magneta Lane are basically ripping off Pretty Girls Make Graves but giving it a vaguely dancepunk-ish sheen" is the best you've got then leave it to someone like Southall who can at least do a decent job. That's a bogus comparison in the first place but it also implies that there might be something not-terrible about PGMG, which is even worse. Nice job with the Canada stuff too, I see a bright future for you at echo magazine or one of its regional equivilants.
Posted 03/23/2005 - 03:27:54 PM by IanMathers:
 In the reviews he's written here, the marks Ryan has given have been pretty normal - mostly Bs, a few As and a few Ds. But then again, writers are usually regarded as overwhelmingly critical after they bash a band you like.
Posted 03/23/2005 - 05:18:36 PM by zopilote:
 obviously, critics should have no obligation to review exclusively what they like, but there really is something amiss with this one, as if everything ryan wrote about not taking the band's hotness into consideration is some meticulously built defense about to crumble. he writes, "I might go so far as to say I “hate” it, except it seems too small and insignificant for that," yet the review reeks of a hate which can't be justified by pgmg-ripping off, an offense that is certainly too small and insignificant for rancor. if his argument that magneta lane are vying for the market more odiously than better bands had some more evidence here, the disdain would be more appropriate, but as is, it just comes across as bitter and unknowledgeable, as if he wants to declare himself better than this band for having rejected professionalism. i heard this album once and feel a d+ rating is about right, but at the risk of sounding unadventurous or old-fashioned, there really is a certain boundary which ryan has crossed in neglecting to entertain any of this album’s flaws for more than a perfunctory diss.
Posted 03/23/2005 - 08:07:28 PM by japann:
 nicely said zopilote.
Posted 03/24/2005 - 12:48:50 AM by peckdude:
 Why am I getting tired of the reviewers who find it more important to bash a band's style, or their attitude about music, rather than actually mentioning the music itself. It doesn't matter if the band 'doesn't try very hard' if the songs are good. Even though you did talk about the songs (very briefly) most of the review was spent on how Magneta Lane are all style. Oh, and the 'Damn you, Canada' thing was a bit overboard.
Posted 03/24/2005 - 09:07:47 PM by japann:
 reading someone describe how an album sounds is boring so I don't mind someone really bashing it out on a band they don't like, as long as they can do it with some humour or at least in a way that makes it seem like they know what they're talking about. "Don't like it? Write your own review"? If that's the attitude you take to criticism can we can expect an album from you soon? Abolishing ratings all together would be fine with a writer who knew how to put together an argument in evaluating something.
Posted 04/09/2005 - 01:44:48 PM by pinkgerl:
 Dear Stylus, Thank you for firing this cynical, ill-informed jerk off whose writing and ideas are both a detriment to the dialogue. I can see by his blog that his ignorance will continue beyond your pages, but at least you don't have to be brought down by it.
Posted 04/10/2005 - 10:18:24 PM by simonlebon:
 Ryan "Hardee" Hardy: is indeed from Toronto. When you see him on the street, please make fun of him. He also wrote this witty piece on what looks like his own blog. Have a look for yourself: