Movie Review
King Kong

By: Paolo Cabrelli

Posted 12/20/2005 - 07:14:49 AM by Justedieu:
 Ugh, I hated this film. So, as you can guess, I'm not at all with you on the review. Except for a few things, on which I'm sure everyone will agree : the amazingly bad music, the useless chars, crap dialogues ... I think my main problem with this film lies in the fact that it is almost twice as long as the original version, which means, as not much has been added, that lots of scenes stretch for too long, some are completely useless. Furthermore, a few things really made me cringe, like that one guy from the island who comes aboard thanks to his vault that just looks terribly fake, the joke-fight with the dinos. I mean, fuck, that fight is like one of the cheapest thing ever, at times I felt like I was watching a rigged wrestling match.
Posted 12/20/2005 - 03:38:09 PM by pabanks46:
 Dude, JIIIIIIIIIIIMY! STAY ON THE BOAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Man, Kong is King of worthless, meaningless character development, repeated scenes of Kong making luvie-dovie eyes at that not-great-to-stare-at face (and, sadly, you do have to stare at her "emote" for incredibly excruciatingly long periods). God, the fights are so tedious. I don't need to see 15 minuts of shooting bugs. I have Blockbuster to go to if I want a dusty copy of Starship Troopers. FUCK MOVIES. Go see Syriana, except you Paolo. You'll prob be bored if you actually enjoy Kong's death knell being a bi-plane flying up his ass. At first, when that happened, I thought the plane hit his male g-spot, but then he went blank, one last stare at the stupid bitch that, somehow, didn't die 5 minutes in from whiplash, and then he fell to Earth. Jack Black should be executed for that final line: "Beauty killed the Beast." Why weren't they arresting him? 'tards.
Posted 12/21/2005 - 11:02:51 AM by hibeside:
 and another reason to hate Peter Jackson. Heart of Darkness quotations? (Maybe if we dress up the whore like a classy bird people will think she's worthy of praise.) It just shows a general lack of restraint and an arrogant faith (aka pretention) in one's own dealings. This sort of tripe should have exited the script the hung over morning after it was written. But a movie with bad acting (JB was laughable and he wasn't trying to be, naomi watts was cloying as ever, brody phoned it in, hanks was miscast), horrible subplots (thank god a black man and a white man can get along in this day in age), darkie holy rollers (why couldn't they have been white? they had to be purple black?), boring dialogue, bad music, a tedious first act, a second act that needed a new editor (how many times in a row can we see kong just shake watts? we get the point), and a typical finish definitly deserves a grading of A-. Peter Jackson, king of reaction shots. I'd love to see him direct. (So just be uh sad in this one, and then immediately after turn hopeful.)
Posted 12/21/2005 - 04:23:42 PM by KlausFraktal:
 This was a dumb movie.
Posted 12/21/2005 - 05:51:28 PM by diddywah:
 Well I wanna buck the trend and say this was a great movie, and all the points highlighted at in the movie are what bugged me too. If I was gonna stretch this movie to 3 hours, I wouldv'e added onto the original bare-bones story, rather than simply stretch each scene to be twice as long as the 1933 version. Still great fun, and I'm saddened by the news that this has bombed (well, in proportion to its budget)
Posted 12/24/2005 - 06:04:01 AM by Aurens:
 The grade and the review do not really match (a tad bit too negative for the A- grade), but I'm glad you found joy and emotional resonant in Kong in the end. You seem clearly in awe of Kong himself, and I would agree. Andy Serkis' performance as Kong, along with other artists worked on Kong, was heartbreaking. Kong himself was a beast who wore its heart on its - uh - sleeves; it was naked emotion unto itself. But it was Naomi Watts as Ann Darrow that made the film the crushing experience that it was for me. You're absolutely right; the film could've worked as a silent film. Watts' performance was essentially a silent star performance, and as the case with great silent stars of the past, body language and facial expression were all that you needed. Her eyes, by god, conveyed the kind of heartbreak and sadness that lingered in your mind much longer after the film was over. Everything was served oversized in Kong, including its sense of fun and tragedy. In the end though, the story of greed and love came through in one of the utmost sublimely romantic sequence ever put on film: ice-sliding in the park. My heart was quietly breaking by that point, and all the flaws in the previous sections became inconsequential. I was in love dammit and I'm not about to let a few things get in the way of this momentous love. If you asked me now about the flaws in this film, almost a full week after having seen it, I'd still be giving you a resounding 'yeah, but'. Because this was exactly that: flawed, beautiful, rambunctious, giddy-i-can't-wait-to-see-you-again monster of a film.
Posted 12/24/2005 - 06:15:01 AM by Aurens:
 One more thing, the music was surprisingly fitting and a lot better than I expected. Some tracks that accompanied the quieter moments were simply gorgeous. I have no complaint about its music at all; in fact I'm looking forward to its nomination in 2006.
Posted 12/27/2005 - 10:26:27 AM by Dennis:
 This was a great movie. Sure, there are plenty of things you can pick on, but anyone who doesn't enjoy this really doesn't have any business watching films to start with....this was an homage to classic Hollywood and the type of movies that inspired Godard and Melville and any of the other great directors that the jaded hipsters above probably love to namedrop at parties, showing everyone just how clueless they really are....
Posted 12/28/2005 - 09:52:50 AM by whiteboysushi:
 This movie was godawful. First time I've actually walked out of a theater before. All of my complaints have already been voiced by other people, hibeside in particular, so I'll just leave it at that.
Posted 12/29/2005 - 07:04:23 PM by hateful:
 Anyone who'd claim that King Kong -- or monster movies in general -- is a major influence on either Melville or Godard is obviously one of those name-dropping hipsters. If you want to argue that monster pictures, in particular the work of James Whale, had an influence on Cocteau, that's an interesting and fair argument. But Godard and Melville are far more interested in American gangster movies, and westerns.
Posted 01/06/2006 - 11:35:27 PM by PlatypusQuest:
 Well, I absolutely loved this movie and (like Roger Ebert) would proclaim it to be the best movie ENTERTAINMENT of the year, though my choice for best flilm of '05 would probably be A History of Violence, Kings and Queen, or (most likely) The New World. Still, this movie has that rare quality of being long and feeling short, a quality shared by recent films like Dogville and Magnolia. King Kong also boasts the most incredible CGI effects I have ever seen and I constantly had to remind myself that what I was seeing was not real. And those action scenes!! Such extraordinary craftsmanship! I loved the frenetic camerawork and the delightful shifts in pacing... Also, special mention must be made of Naomi Watts' stellar performance. To maintain that level of distress and terror in front of a green screen for oh-so-many scenes couldn't have been all that easy, and she pulls it off with ease. She's such a fantastic actress. Oh, and one last thing: I thought the first act (hour) that so many people are complaining about was wonderful. I can't remember seeing a more fully realized 1930s Manhattan. Job well done!!
Posted 01/19/2006 - 01:18:17 AM by :
 Well I absolutely HATED this movie. The monsters looked like cardboard cutouts and you could see the fucking hands jigging the limbs. Ugh, I loved this film. The grainy dream-motion sequence of the island dwellers was blood-poisoningly horrific. Duuuuuuuuuude! This was the most worthless piece of celluloid trash ever to funk a box of popcorn...actors? You mean those people regressing to 6 year old versions of themselves to play dress up for their best friends? And another reason to love Peter Jackson. The guy`s clearly been obsessed with Kong since a chimp played rollover for him at the zoo. That`s the kind of visionary artistic endeavour we import to Kevin Shields, Brian Wilson & the Marquis de Sade. Lifetime achievement award I say. Yeah, well hey, buck your trend buddy. I could have made a better King Kong movie with my girlfriend`s pussy and a face painted on my little finger. Those dumbass Kiwis. God they must be bored.